Monday, May 7, 2012

Mood Swings...Making My Marriage Magnificent in May

I'm not the only with them. Though I tend to be the least forgiving of them.

I am quick to get snappy right back. I'm not good at diffusing a situation that did not need to turn ugly in the first place.

I know not everyone who reads my blog is a Christian, but since I am I just want to warn you I am gonna get all Christian on ya. I don't say this so that you stop reading and exit this post, but so that you're aware that your about to glean from my Christianity. grin.

James 1:19-20 tells us this- "This you know my beloved brethren, But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger, for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God."

I am capable of being a good listener, but (I don't like this but... sigh) I don't practice my listening skills nearly often enough. I think about what I want to say, instead of focusing on his words. Especially in a disagreement. I'm ready with my venomous poison (my words) when he pauses a moment.

While I am not a complete failure at this, there is TONS of room for improvement.

We both have physical hearing problems. He had surgery on one of his ears when a child and I have Minere's Disease. We often truly don't hear each other. I get annoyed with repeating myself and with my body for not being able to hear him.

All these things can set the mood in our house, which is usually a lousy one. I get edgy and I expect him to forgive me. To take it like a man. That because I am a woman I have the right to get moody. But when he does it I rear my ugly mood right back at him.

Even when he cracks a joke and tries to defuse a situation that has turned ugly, I roll my eyes and spew more venomous words at him. Usually at an unnecessarly high volume. Boo. Who wants to live like that. I know I don't. I won't. I want to change my ways. I want my marriage to be magnificent!

I pledge to accept his defusing jokes and allow him to bring me back down from my high horse.  To take the time to laugh with my husband. To show him my happy side. To be FUN again.

Have you lost your FUN? How can you get it back, if you have? What are you going to do to be a better listener and be angry less?


  1. Oh dear, we have a lot in common....unfortunately for me, my husband's jokes are 99% of the time sarcastic, and as I'm sure you're aware when one is in a "mood" it's hard to recognize sarcasm and that it's a joke. We need to find ways to defuse situations, but I don't think jokes are going to work for us.

    1. Catch phrases that you both agree upon when your not in a mood? Like, "I need a time out." Either person could say it and the convo needs to stop NOW. ? BUT one must agree to use it when they really mean it and not just to get out of talking. HA

    2. OH and you have to agree to a set time that the convo stops for. 1 hour or 1 day...?