I am not new to forgiving others.
I was able to forgive my Dad for killing my mother and then himself. That was hard, but not like this. He was dead, I did not have to have him in my life. Tho I miss him dearly and still love him. I KNOW how to forgive and the healing it brings.
But today, I struggle with it. I just wanna be mad for a while. Ever been there?
My almost 7 year old daughter drank gasoline that my husband put in a pop bottle this past Saturday.
She is fine, thank God.
It scared me greatly. He was careless. He doesn't seem to grasp the gravity of the situation, either. She did not drink much and it mostly made her act slightly drunk. Tired and dizzy. Extreme stomache pain. Gasoline breath for three days.
I thank God He knew I could not handle something horrid happening to my little girl and He spared her life.
I want to cry everytime I think of what might have happened. I was not home when it happend. I arrived a half hour after. My husband had not called poison control to see if she should have milk, what to watch for, or if she should go to the ER. He did wash her face and have her rinse her mouth with water.
I understand that it only hurts me to harbor this anger and unforgiving attitude I hold on to. I know it will take root and grow into bitterness.
Then why? I know others struggle with bigger issues than this.
How do I get past this Lord?
Please pray with me about my attitude.