Tonight I let my old self bring my forgiven self down. I allowed her to beat up the new me. I allowed her to make me cry. I let her treat me like the POS that I used to be.
I am not perfect, and never claim to be. Then little things brightened my night.
Things like sharing in the joys of being a proud a parent with a friend. Having all the chickens in the coop; not having to carry them from the barn to the coop. Seeing new hair growing in on my goats nose. Which means I finally found the item she was deficient in that was causing her nose to go bald. (Yeah!!) Go figure it was Zinc. All she needed was some baby butt creme rubbed into her balding nose and wallah, nose hair grows back! Cheap easy fix. A fix I have been searching for months now.
Yes, the kids did not go to bed when told. Yes, they got up several times. Yes, my day was filled with whining and anger. Some mine, some theirs.
But I am moving forward and learning and growing. Everyday makes for a brighter tomorrow.
I will not let the old me tell the woman I have become that I am not worthy. God has deemed me worthy. Thank you Lord! He knows I will never be perfect and I will still mess up BADLY, but He loves me anyway!